The words to this song by Steven Curtis Chapman are the groanings of my heart right now. I fight, claw my way to the light to grasp hope, and still sometimes in the struggle I let my ear be bent that it is hopeless, that the shuddering gape of pain is stronger than the will I have to fight for more. It is rare that I don't have words to illustrate my soul, but somehow, that's where I'm finding myself right now; speechless, burning, afloat in a sea that renders me flailing, gasping, waiting for rescue.
We are facing things I never dared to imagine. We get like that, don't we? Confident in ourselves that certain things will never touch us. Thanks for the dose of reality...
How would our hearts even know what to pray? Mine doesn't, and people don't want to hear that. I am in one day at a time mode; focusing on the next thing, and then the next thing. There are promises I am clinging to; I know I won't be left here in this valley alone. I know He will meet me there, but the waiting is tough.
Please, dear community, pray us through this. We know in our hearts that beauty comes from ashes, but we have a hard fire to battle first.
Steven Curtis Chapman~ "Jesus Will Meet You There"
PLEASE LEAVE ME A COMMENT, IT LETS ME KNOW YOU'RE LISTENING!!!
I am praying for you. Thank you for sharing your life with us. You are a amazing mother. I have hit my bottom before with my son who has CP. time in the ICU not knowing if he was coming home. I know your bottom has been much deeper. I love your blogs and read them always, but sometimes I post a comment but it doesn't come up. I am sure there is much more like me who read this and pray for you, but don't comment. Don't get discouraged by a that. Keep posting and thanks for sharing! Kristie
ReplyDeleteI am praying for you. Thank you for sharing your life with us. You are a amazing mother. I have hit my bottom before with my son who has CP. time in the ICU not knowing if he was coming home. I know your bottom has been much deeper. I love your blogs and read them always, but sometimes I post a comment but it doesn't come up. I am sure there is much more like me who read this and pray for you, but don't comment. Don't get discouraged by a that. Keep posting and thanks for sharing! Kristie
ReplyDeleteThank you, Kristie! It helps me to know there are people like you out there, praying me through. I'm glad to know you have made it through your deep places.
ReplyDeleteI am sorry for all the news I am reading.
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Please let me know how you all are.