My Dearest Hannah,
Today and tomorrow are the culmination of a year of grieving for you, Mark, the kids and all who love you. It doesn't mean that the grieving will end...ever. But it does highlight the fact that your loving Heavenly Father brought each of you through the first year of a grief you thought you could not survive. Today your mind will take you back hour by hour, minute by minute to relive that last day. And you will feel the awful emptiness as little Ellianna is taken from your arms again...only this time she is celebrating her first year of eternity, of health, of waiting for you.
Do not second-guess any of choices you and Mark made; any of the care you gave; any of the love you poured out on her. You are an amazing mother...Ellie was never more than a heartbeat away from you all the time you carried her, and still, while she breathed earth's air. I think of Ellianna as a Peace Child: she completed the days God had for her, and He brought her Home. And in the wake of her little life, many hearts have been made tender, and many have been healed.
Tomorrow, don't awaken with dread. Awaken with hope. You have new life growing within you...an amazing gift. Not a replacement for loss, but a reason to hope and to celebrate. I have learned MUCH from you...enough that I don't have the days left in my life to practice it all. I love you, precious daughter...and, like Ellie, you are never more than a heartbeat away from me.
Please leave me a comment; it lets me know you're listening!